Dodger pitcher Zach Greinke stands his ground against charging Padre Carlos Quentin.

Benches cleared, punches thrown, bones broken. I know Padres fans love to chant “Beat L.A.” but this was ridiculous! That Carlos Quentin, whom a livid Dodger Manager Don Mattingly rightfully called “stupid,” should be kicked out of baseball. He leans over the plate on a 3-2 count and then charges the mound when he gets hit? As Mattingly says, he doesn’t even know how the game works. What a maroon!

Now our No. 2 pitcher, Zach Greinke, is out with a broken collar bone.

I’ve never seen Mattingly so pissed off. I swear I saw steam coming out of his ears as he spoke with reporters after the game. He said Quentin should not be allowed to play until Greinke is able to pitch again. “If he plays before Greinke pitches,” Mattingly said, “something is wrong.”

The Dodgers won, miraculously, 3-2, on a pinch-hit solo homer by Juan Uribe, of all people. (It was Uribe’s second home run of the series.)

I was listening to the first inning when Adrian Gonzalez gave the boys in blue an early lead with a two-run homer, and I thought maybe it would be that breakout night when we would score tons of runs and embarrass the shit out of San Diego. But no. Those tons of runs were all left on base as we stranded 12 more runners, making our LOB in this early season a whopping 75. That has to be a record.

In fact after the brawl in the bottom of the sixth, the Padres tied it up, 2-2, making Uribe’s eighth-inning shot the game-winner. Woo hoo! But also, boo hoo! Greinke will be on the DL for up to six weeks, and Matt Kemp and Jerry Hairston face possible suspensions for their actions during the melee.

So we won and lost all at the same time.

Every baseball season has its share of satisfactions and disillusionment, its thrills and despair.” — Jim Brosnan, The Lone Season

Sometimes, all those things come in one game.

Satisfactions
Chad Billingsley came off the disabled list and did reasonably well for someone who hasn’t pitched in a real game since August — 6 innings, 5 hits, 1 earned run. Smooth sailing, right? Not so fast.

Disillusionment
It’s true this “Whole New Blue” does one thing better than ever before: They strand more runners than seems physically possible. In the first eight games, the Dodgers have left 63 men on base, nearly 8 per game. This time alone, they marooned 12 guys, including loaded bases in the top of the ninth.

Thrills
Home runs are always thrilling, and this time we had twice as many as in any other game this season. A lead-off homer by Carl Crawford gave the Dodgers a boost right off the bat, and A.J. Ellis made his mark with a two-run shot in the second. Add to that the run scored by Crawford after a beautiful triple and Mark Ellis’ single, and you have a 4-1 lead going into the ninth. No problem, huh? Think again.

Despair
I haven’t liked Brandon League since he came to this club. I don’t think he’s as good a relief pitcher as they think he is. He may have been good once, and, to be honest, he was robbed on a couple of strikes by a blind umpire while trying to save this game. But more often than not since he’s been in Dodger Blue, he gets into more trouble than he’s worth. This game was no exception. He almost lost it, with an assist from a passed ball by A.J. Ellis, and it was painful to watch.

I know, I know, almost only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades (sometimes it felt like that’s what League was throwing). Only the W counts in the end. But that roller-coaster ride almost made my dinner come up.