Archives for category: 2014
My fellow Aries, Andre Ethier, celebrates today (April 10)!

Are this year’s Dodgers really doomed to go up and down constantly throughout the season until they wind up in the middle of the pack watching the Diamondbacks or Padres go to the playoffs? Can that really be the case?

I messed up the other day when I talked about how great our starting pitching is. (Jinx much, Pam?) I knocked on wood and everything! So now there’s no stopping hitters from all the other teams just trouncing us mercilessly, I guess.

We started off well Thursday (April 6) with a 5-2 win over the D’backs in Arizona. BOX SCORE I only kind of half-watched it around the latest episode of “Ted Lasso.” But Dustin May had another quality start, so that’s the only bright light in an otherwise dismal series in Phoenix.

On Friday (April 7), they nipped us, 6-3, with Clayton Kershaw not having his best appearance on the mound. But we were still in a one-run game until reliever Yency Almonte gave them an extra two runs in the bottom of the 8th. BOX SCORE

My hunch is that Kersh isn’t adjusting to the dreaded pitch clock well. He has a very deliberate and calculating delivery. It takes him a few moments to aim his slider just right. He likes to take a little stroll around the mound after stunning a batter with a delicious eephus. He’s also one of the best guys to pick off players at first that has ever played the game. So this rushed pressure of counting down the seconds is really (pardonnez mon français) FUCKED! It takes all the beauty and artful consideration out of pitching. Now it’s just hurl it and hope for the best, hurl it and hope for the best! (Plus, with all the talk of bigger bases and only two throws to first allowed, I have only seen one attempt at a stolen base this whole season! You’re destroying the most beautiful game, MLB assholes!)

My birthday (April 8) saw a wild one! Thor (Noah Syndergaard) pitched about as well as Chris Hemsworth would have. Staked to a 4-0 lead in the first, he wasn’t throwing lightning bolts, that’s for sure. Arizona took him for 8 hits and 6 earned runs in four innings. We ended up losing, 12-8. BOX SCORE

And then on Sunday (April 9), the Snakes sealed the series win with an 11-6 drubbing. Michael Grove gave up 9 runs on 9 hits in the first 3.1 innings. Yikes! BOX SCORE

Can we right the ship? Is that awful timebomb of a pitch clock going to destroy America’s Pastime altogether? We have 152 more Dodger games to go. We’ll see.

dodgers dollar signOne of these things, $tan Ka$ten and his cohorts in Dodger management care very much about.

The other can go to hell in a hand-basket for all they care. (Actually, the trip started last year when so few people showed up to the games that bobblehead nights were rarely more than ⅔ full and many concession stands were closed!)

But, hey! They got their $8.5 billion. Who gives a fig if the loyal fans who have loved their team through thick and thin for more than 50 years can’t enjoy the games at home on their TV sets, hear the melodious voice of Vin Scully and feel part of a community with a common and heartfelt passion.

It makes me physically ill to see this crippling greed and loathsome insensitivity take hold of my beloved Dodgers. And I’m not alone. I dread saying it, but one of my least favorite haters is on our side in this. Read Plaschke from yesterday’s L.A. Times.

“The most impactful collision of greed and arrogance in this town’s sports history,” Bill Plaschke writes, “has resulted in wreckage that is still smoking in the middle of the freeway, looking like another six-month SigAlert, twisted metal everywhere.”

And we are the hapless victims of this crash, bleeding on the side of Stadium Way, wishing an ambulance would come and whisk us off to salvation.

Who cares if half the National League West champion team from last year is gone? Andrew Friedman’s Moneyball tinkering won’t mean a thing if no one can watch the damn games.

Some say absence makes the heart grow fonder, but in this case it’s out of sight, out of mind. You’ll see it when the camera pans the stands and nobody’s there. Oh, wait, no you won’t.

I felt a little guilty skipping out in the 7th as the Dodgers were behind, 7-0, though not bad enough to stay for the post-game praying at Faith & Family Day. Even God couldn’t have saved the Dodgers as they fell to the Brewers, 7-2.

Then as Steve and I walked past the executive parking lot, my guilt was assuaged by the sight of someone slinking past us in his black luxury automobile to the strains of “God Bless America” emanating from the half-full, sun-baked stadium. If anyone should have more faith in the Dodgers than I do, it’s $tan Ka$ten, don’t you think?

Stan FleeingI don’t know if it was the pathetic weakness the Dodgers have shown in the first three games of this home stand, being swept by the Milwaukee Brewers. I don’t know if he is frustrated by the injuries that have been chipping away at our first-place team’s foundation. Or if he just had something better to do on a sweltering Sunday afternoon. But he looked like he couldn’t wait to get as far away from Chavez Ravine as he possibly could. (It couldn’t have been the desire to beat the traffic. Since the Dodgers have been off TV for most of us, our interest seems to have flagged. Even “sell-out” games have lots of empty seats.)

Ka$ten probably just doesn’t care that much about the team. Lord knows, he doesn’t care about the fans. Who needs ’em? His prayers have already been answered to the tune of $8 billion.